Saturday, October 3, 2015

October Poetry Writing Month, Day Three: Numb

Day three, and I finally feel like I'm being more productive in my writing which is a relief. I was fearful that Writer's Block might keep me from continuing on throughout this month, and I intend to not let that happen.

The prompt for today was to write about what drains me. I decided to go back six years while I was in hardest part of my recovery from surgery to obliterate my Cerebral AVM rupture. So, yes, this is another AVM poem. The first two years was the hardest. Being in emotional pain, sometimes physical pain and having to go throughout the day for work and Church like nothing is wrong. This and the recovery left me numb and drained. Luckily, years later, I am doing better.

As always, critiques are welcomed.

Numb

5:47 am reads my clock as I awaken to see I am alive
"X" another day on the calendar since I had survived
Wow...survival...that word now has a different meaning
Strength, survival those words just are not convening
A Survivor! Where is the strength that comes from becoming one?
Maybe that along with myself and my spirit is long gone
A lost and pained little girl now lives inside me
 I do not want to go out there with nothing to guide me
Much rather do I want to stay inside and just hide
Man, man oh man! Is this what it means to survive?
My body no longer feels like it is my own
Much plagued by pains that stings to the bone
So badly do I want to cry by the tears will not come
This room so dark and cold, matches me, so dark so numb
No friendly face, no understanding nearby can be known
But I'll have to find my own strength, do this on my own

- LWV





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